I obtained a silly band [the rubber variously shaped bracelets] in the shape of a guitar. It was red. It still is red, in fact.
Even though I am considered an “adult” I like silly bands and usually wear one or two around my wrist. I thought about adding this red one to my collection but decided there was someone else in the world who needed it more than I. His name is Martin, a production assistant in my office. [name changed for security purposes] Martin is a blossoming musician. We talk todos los dias [roughly translated, every day] about our hopes, fears, and dreams. His dreams including becoming a traveling musician- my dreams including zombies rising from the ground, attacking me in Times Square.
I texted Martin this morning saying, “Hey Ricardo [a moniker of his],I have a present for you”. Seconds later Martin walked into my office holding his phone open. I hadn’t realized he was already in the building. I was not prepared and quickly hid the red rubber guitar in the first place I could think of, my mouth. When he started talking to me, I knew the only way to really keep this a secret, was to swallow it. I then remembered what happened last time I did that, and decided to pretend I was chewing gum. Martin sat down and held his phone to me, shaking it. “Yes I have a present for you”, I said. I took in a quick deep breath, pointed down the hall, and said “OMG Willie Nelson”. Martin jumped up and ran down the hall.
He returned with a frown, which morphed into a smile, when I showed him what I had for him. I then gave it to him.
He did not know what a silly band was and asked me if they were like beanie babies. I said, “No Martin. These are rubber bands…beanie babies are little velvet animals stuffed with beans.” He then told me I take everything literally and stormed off saying he was going to search the building for Willie Nelson.
I was proud of myself for doing such a good deed- but I’m nervous now, because I hear “No good deed goes unpunished”. I wonder how I will be punished.
Yes, silly bands can be compared to beanie babies, and pogs, and paparazzi’s…I mean, Tamagotchis. All fall under the category of fads. That’s such a weird word…category. I was 9 or 10 years old when Tamagotchis became popular. It was summertime and I was at my sisters friend’s house. They were a year older than me. She had a younger brother, a year younger than me. We were getting ready to go swimming in her backyard-outground pool and I was wandering around the house making observations. I saw the brother’s tamagotchi sitting on a wooden chest that held picture frames. I picked up the tamagotchi and noticed the animal had not “hatched” yet but was sitting on the screen as an egg. I pressed one of the three buttons and when I did, I heard a beep and saw a 2 hour countdown begin.
A shock of nervous heat was sent up my spine because I was worried that boy-child, younger than I, did not want his animal to hatch yet. I heard my sister and her friend walking down the hall. I slowly put the virtual toy back on the wooden chest. “What’s wrong”, my sister asked me. “Nothing”, I said straight faced. We swam in the pool that day and all I could picture was the throbbing egg on the digital screen with the numbers counting down when it would hatch. All I could think of was the boy looking at his Tamagotchi days later, seeing the animal died because he didn’t even know it hatched in the first place. All I could think of was the moment I would get accused of starting the countdown of impending doom.
Oh how my fears have changed.
Do you like my spandex flower shorts?
UPDATE AS OF 10:43pm…
I noticed Martin wasn’t wearing his guitar silly band toward the end of the day. He retreated to his desk with a frown and returned with this.
I guess this is how I was punished-breaking the only thing that ever meant anything to me. He said he wanted to see if the band would keep shape even if he stretched it really far…That’s the point of silly bandz, Martin, they keep shape!!!