A GREAT DAY: THE WORST SONG EVER
May 29, 2015
A video recorded of an amazing day I had in New York City.
The song is bad, but the memories are great.
Another bad song video recorded about my great time cat sitting.
Another bad song video about stuffing envelopes.
GREAT TIME IN JERSEY CITY
May 18, 2015
One moment better than the next.
ME AND MY BIRDS
May 15, 2015
WELL WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE
May 15, 2015
BOWLING AT THE WHITE HOUSE
May 11, 2015
*This blog post was written 12/8/14*
This past weekend, I bowled in the Harry S. Truman Bowling Alley.
The exclusive 2 lane alley located in the basement of the Eisenhower Executive Office Building of The White House.
My cousin works at The White House. She invited my family and I to bowl on 12/6 from 5-7pm.
Outside the alley, there was a sign that read “TRUMAN BOWLING ALLEY”.
With a cartoon bowling ball knocking over carton pins. And a red cartoon arrow pointing right.
We followed the arrow inside.
In the first room, I saw a cubby holed wall of bowling shoes.
The shoes were new and beautiful.
My shoe size is 9 1/2. There were two numbers on each shoe. One black, one red. I stared at the wall for a minute debating which size referred to the woman’s size. I did not know.
“Play it cool,” I told myself, “don’t let anyone know you are confused.”
Being in the White House made me feel the need to look all-knowlingly smart.
“Do you need help finding your shoe size?” My cousin Blair asked me.
“Nah, I’m good honey,” I responded.
“Did you just call me honey?” Blair asked confused. Blair is my age. And I never use the word honey.
I laughed, grabbed a pair of shoes and walked into the room with the lanes.
Chance was on my side. I grabbed the perfectly sized shoes.
By laughing and walking away, to my cousin Blair I appeared super-smart!
Upon entering the next room, I asked my sister to take my photo.
I stood smiling. With my hands at my side. My long side bang resting over my right eye. Parrot on my shoulder. We looked great. I felt confident.
The first hour in the alley was spent with my cousins/Aunts taking turns on both lanes.
There was no system of order or competition.
Here is me mid-bowl.
My parrot flew up in the air two inches because of Force. A physics term that means, “strength or energy as an attribute of physical action or movement.”
I walked around the room.
Looking at photos on the wall.
Here is a photo of Martin Short.
And Kristin Chenoweth too.
Parrot and I posed with the POTUS.
Mimicking his stance.
Before writing this blog post, I did not know what POTUS meant.
Now I know. It means President of the United States.
My family divided ourselves up in two teams. The second hour was spent in competition.
My sister and I put out heads together and smiled. Parrot on my shoulder. Crystal Vase got in on the action too.
A wonderful time.
May 4, 2015
I saw the play “Cats” last night.
For the first time in my life.
The play was at Wagner College Theater on Staten Island in NYC.
After the play I got my photo taken with four actors.
Dressed in their cat costumes.
Press play for exclusive video below.
April 20, 2015
I woke up this morning
Looked at the time on my cable box.
It was 6:37am.
“This is great,” I thought to myself
“It is so early and I feel wide awake. I never feel this awake so early in the morning. I will get up, get coffee and go for a bike ride. I will be so productive,” I said.
I stood up and got out of bed.
I looked at my iPhone 6.
The time on the iPhone read 10:33am.
“Huh?” I thought to myself.
I looked back at the cable box. 6:37am.
I looked at my iPhone. 10:33am.
I realized the cable box must have froze on 6:37.
In one second, I lost 4 figurative hours of my life.
It was a weird feeling to think it was one time, then realize it was another.
“Ok, then,” I thought.
I left my house and drove to Dunkin Donuts.
I got a medium iced coffee with almond milk.
I drove to the South Beach boardwalk on Staten Island.
I got out of my car.
I kicked a pinecone.
I walked onto the boardwalk.
I put my hair in a pony tail.
I took out my iPhone
and put on the Henry Winkler episode of the Marc Maron WTF podcast.
I walked to the rail
and stretched my calf
while watching a baseball game.
I jogged from the boardwalk to Fort Wadsworth.
I saw a woman take a photo of her cute dog puppy.
I jogged back.
I drove home.
Then drove to Jersey City
to meet my friends Kristen and Stephanie
Here is a photo of me and Kristen.
I ordered a spinach, broccoli, and green pepper omelet.
Can’t forget the potatoes. haha.
Great conversation and company.
I drove back to Staten Island.
Posed for a photo in the kitchen
with my Mother and sister.
We ate our first BBQ dinner of the season
inside because it was chilly outside.
My Father sported his Boston Celtics sweatshirt and Cincinnati Reds cup.
I looked in the mirror.
A giraffe kissed me on the head.
It was so great.
A great day.
BECKY KRAUSE SOLO COMEDY SHOW
April 17, 2015
I would love for you to come check out my upcoming solo comedy show!
BECKY KRAUSE: I DREAMED A DREAM
THURS, 4/30 @9:30PM at The Peoples Improv Theater
Tickets are $5 here.
April 12, 2015
I began my day by picking up my friend Laura’s bike.
It sat locked on the street overnight. In front of Bloomingdales.
Laura is a former co-worker/current friend. She lives in Santa Monica. And let me borrow her bike.
I rode the bike to Huckleberry a delicious cafe and bakery.
I locked up the bike on the street corner.
I sat outside and ate poached eggs with market vegetables.
I did not eat the tomatoes because tomatoes are gross.
After breakfast, I walked back to the bike.
That’s when I noticed
something was wrong.
The bike’s basket handle was broken.
I felt confused.
Was the basket’s handle supposed to look like that?
Was it like this yesterday and I didn’t notice?
Should I cut the basket handle off and hope that Laura won’t know the difference?
I pushed the handle down to make it look better.
I rode my bike to Equinox gym where Laura was working out.
I was meeting her to get her apartment key.
I was going to make a copy of the key while she was in exercise class.
Because I am going to stay at her apartment.
Laura walked up to the bike.
She looked at the basket’s handle.
“A giant bird,” I shouted, trying to distract her, “Wearing a Laker’s uniform! It must be ten feet tall!”
She didn’t fall for the distraction.
“Someone must have damaged the bike in the nighttime,” I explained to her.
“Don’t worry Becky. It’s all good,” Laura said to me and gave me a thumbs up.
My worries were relieved.
“Now where’s that giant bird?” she asked.
I left laura and headed to the Locksmiths. I looked up a locksmith using Google Maps.
I rode my bike for one mile.
I arrived to the locksmith’s address but it was an apartment. Not a store.
I called the locksmith number.
“Locksmith,” a man answered.
“Hi, are you open?” I asked.
“Well, we are a locksmith who goes to your house if you get locked out. We don’t have a store,” he said.
“Oh. So you don’t make key copies?” I asked.
“No. You can go to a hardware store,” he said.
“Ok, thanks. Bye,” I said.
I biked to Fisher hardware store a mile away.
A nice man copied the key.
It took him less than one minute to do.
“That will be $1.89,” he told me.
“That’s so cheap,” I thought.
“Can I get another key made?” I asked.
“Sure!” he said.
I got two extra keys made. Figured Laura could use an extra one.
I wanted to get twenty more keys made. Because they were cheap. But that would have been unnecessary.
I gave Laura her keys.
We said goodbye.
I drove in my rental car,
listening to Third Eye Blind’s song “Semi-Charmed Life” 6 times in a row,
to Runyon Canyon Park.
I was excited to do my first California hike.
The hike started off great.
The trail was populated.
There were two paths.
I picked the one to the left. I had no idea where it led and no idea what the hike was like.
I was excited to see beautiful views.
The trail got steep.
Each time I got to the top of the inclines, my heart pounded quickly.
I paused in the middle of hills to take breaks.
It was difficult for me. I was not familiar with the path.
It felt great to exercise.
I got to the top and saw the HOLLYWOOD sign.
The descent began.
I walked down carefully.
I (purposely) slid on my booty a few times too.
I felt relieved it was downhill the rest of the way.
Until I saw stairs going up.
I got to a flat part.
I saw a cute puppy looking at me.
As a man and a woman exchanged a black cap.
I felt exhausted.
Good looking-hot too.
I took some photos of myself jumping in the air.
Here is a photo of me right before I jump.
I think it’s a funny photo because of my “pointer toes” body position and my face.
It felt great to walk downhill.
I was now on the other side of the mountain from where I started.
I saw the path I hiked. (outlined in green)
Without knowing, I took the steeper path.
A metaphor for life.
I walked down sandy stairs.
My sneakers slipped on a banana peel.
I caught myself before falling.
I got to the bottom of the mountain.
And fell asleep.
A great experience.
April 10, 2015
I awoke in my Aunt’s house in La Jolla, San Diego.
My Aunt was at work. She left me a list of suggestions of fun and interesting things to do.
I drank a cup of Peet’s coffee at her kitchen table as I planned my day.
I walked out of the house at 9:50am.
And got into my 2015 Nissan Altima rental car.
Guided by the Google Maps GPS on my iPhone 6, I headed to the Encinitas Self-Realization Fellowship Gardens.
I drove a half hour along the coast.
Instead of taking me to the Self-Realization Gardens, the GPS took me to the Self-Realization Temple. I didn’t know the difference between the Gardens and the Temple because I had never been to either before in my life. I thought they were one in the same.
A sign said the temple was closed.
“Oh well,” I thought, “I drove a half hour, to a closed attraction. But Encinitas is a cute town. I will walk around.”
On the corner, I noticed a yoga studio with its door open.
A 65-year-old woman, dressed in tidied (pronounced: tye-died) blue and white stretch pants stood looking out the window. Another 65-year-old woman was laying flat on her back on the floor. On top of a yoga mat.
I walked into the studio. I stepped into the doorway just as the woman standing up started talking to the woman on the floor. They didn’t notice I had walked in. I stood for twenty seconds.
“Excuse me, is there a class going on?” I asked.
“If people show up,” the tidied pants woman said to me smiling. She was the instructor.
“What kind of class is it?” I asked. Trying to sound confident.
“It’s a donation based practice class,” she said.
“What time does it start?”
I looked at my phone. It was 10:25am.
I walked into the studio. Took off my sneakers and socks.
“I don’t have a mat,” I said apologetically.
“I might have an extra,” she said. She walked behind the counter and handed me a pink mat with flowers on it.
“Oh, great. Thanks,” I responded.
I placed my mat in the center of the yoga studio and sat cross legged on the mat.
By 10:35am, 7 other 65-year-old women joined the class. And one man who walked in at 10:40am.
The class was an hour and fifteen minutes comprised of gentle yoga moves. The moves stretched my neck, back, hips, legs, stomach, knees, toes, eyes, etc.
The women in the class knew the upcoming yoga move before the instructor said the next one. It was apparent these people were regulars.
When I didn’t know a position, I used the short white/grey haired woman wearing astrological stretch pants in front of me to my right as my guide. Her stretch pants were dark blue with suns, moons, and stars. She was a tiny woman in great shape. She had perfect yoga moves and no fat on her body.
Attending the class was such a random experience. I didn’t know anyone. In a random Californian beach town. I liked it.
The class ended.
“Thank you so much,” I said to the instructor as I was leaving.
“Where are you from?” she asked me. Like a pink sock among yellow socks, I stood out.
“Staten Island, New York,” I said.
“I am from Rochester, New York,” She told me.
“I don’t really care,” I said.
Just kidding. I didn’t say that.
I left the class, leaving a $20 donation. I wanted to leave an $8 dollar donation but the yoga teacher was staring at me as I was counting my one dollar bills. Which made me feel nervous and cheap. So I left a $20 bill instead.
“You have to go check out the Self-Realization Gardens,” she said to me. She pointed up the block away from the temple.
“Ok. I will. Thanks!” I said happily.
I walked up the block in a great mood. The day was sunny. My body was filled with endolphins from the wonderful yoga class.
I reached the Meditation Garden’s sign.
I followed the arrow.
I walked onto the grounds.
The grounds were beautiful. Filled with manicured plants, grass, and trees.
I sat on a bench. Starring into the distance with good posture.
I walked through a tree path
to the top of the hill overlooking the Pacific Ocean.
I knew it is the Pacific Ocean because when I tagged a location on Instagram it located itself at the Pacific Ocean.
I tried to meditate but I don’t know how to meditate. Also I have a short attention span. I enjoyed the garden’s beauty.
I left the meditation grounds and headed to Swami’s Cafe on US 101 Highway.
I ordered a whole wheat protein wrap.
Which had broccoli, lettuce, tofu, feta cheese, and avocado. I picked out the red onions because I do not like those.
I ordered a peanut butter smoothie for the road. Made of peanut butter and vanilla ice cream.
I drove towards Mission Bay.
On my way I passed Sea World.
I felt intrigued. I went to Sea World in Florida as a child and loved it. My sister, Emily, was obsessed with dolphins and whales. She had a killer whale snow globe and many dolphin figurines in her bedroom. One dolphin figurine swung back and forth like a pendulum. During the SeaWorld show we attended circa 1997, Emily got called up to the whale tank, in front of the entire crowd, to sing a fish inspired rendition of the ABCs. If my memory serves me correctly.
My positive feelings towards Sea World turned negative after watching Blackfish. The documentary that revealed the harsh conditions for the caged Sea World animals. And the dangers the caged whales pose for the trainers.
To be honest, I would be entertained if I saw a trained whale show today. But I’d rather see whales swimming happily in the wild. I don’t think I would ever pay to see a whale show again.
I stopped at Mission Bay.
There were people biking and swimming and three women riding along the water on horseback.
I then drove to Point Loma.
A beautiful place to walk along cliffs and look at the ocean.
I sat with my feet dangling over the edge of the cliff.
I walked to the top of a sand/wood combo staircase.
I pretended I was in the Reese Witherspoon movie, WILD.
Specifically where she hurts her toe. And falls to the ground.
I drove through the funky town of Hillcrest.
Then met my Aunt for a delicious sushi meal near her house.
We shared a vegetable spring roll, a veggie sushi roll, and a tofu/rice prepared as if it were salmon but it was tofu meal. It was delicious.
It was a wonderful day.